Give your kids a traditional


without the Christ.

1. Oh Rest Ye Merry, Gentlemen
2.The Holly and the Ivy
3. Lost in the Snow (O Little Town of Bethlehem and We Three Kings)
4. Here We Come A-wassailing
5. Ukrainian Bell Carol
6. I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day
7. What Day Is This? (What Child Is This?)
8. Go Tell It on the Mountain
9. O Christmas Eve (O Holy Night)
10. Silent Night
11. Everyone Has Someone on Christmas Except Me (A New Song!)
12. Auld Lang Syne

Click here to buy a download of The Atheist Christmas Album! — $10

Don’t you love reliving your childhood at Christmas? Ever since I have kids of my own, Christmas has once again become the highlight of the year and something to get excited about! Of course, being an atheist, there have been some changes to how my own family celebrates the festive season compared to when I was growing up. No church, no nativities. It’s a strictly secular holiday, and I regret losing none of the religious nonsense!

Well…. There is one thing I regret. The music! Christmas just isn’t Christmas without all that great traditional music, but in our culture – which is so dominated by Christian influences – home is the one and only place I can guarantee Christ won’t slip in through the cracks. I figured I just had to sacrifice the best Christmas songs …..

Or do I?

No…. I decided that Christianity has robbed enough people over the centuries. It’s time for a little retribution, and they will pry my Christmas music from my dead, rotting ears! I have re-written and recorded many of my favourite Christmas songs, removing all the Baby Jesus, and now you can enjoy the classics without the Christ, too!

So is this a parody, Weird Al style album? No – not at all! If you didn’t know I had changed the lyrics… well… you wouldn’t know I had changed the lyrics! It’s a completely normal, Christmassy recording…. Just sans the birth of a mythological entity.

Why not just listen to secular songs or instrumental versions? Because they suck ass. Okay… they don’t all suck ass, I’m exaggerating. But when I think of my favourite Christmas songs, they are all very religious. And as for instrumental songs? I’m a singer… I wanna sing along, too goddamn it.

Do you really listen to your own music? Damn right I do! That’s how I know it’s good. The Atheist Christmas album is my 7th album, and I know by now that the album ain’t finished unless I love to listen to it so much that I get lost in it.

Did you make this album just to piss off Christians? No. In fact, I have an alternate version called The Secular Christmas Album for anyone who wants the album, but feels put off by the word “atheist.” I have no intention of attacking how they celebrate, but likewise, we should be able to celebrate in our own way. Will there be Christians ready to burn me alive for making this album…. OF COURSE! But I don’t really give two shits. That’s their problem, not mine.

Why is it a “Christmas” album if it isn’t religious? Because that’s what the holiday on December 25th is called. I’m all for rebranding the holiday, but at this time, we have no atheist alternative word for Christmas. Also, it is not a holidays album. I have not included songs from any other religions that celebrate during the general festive season.

This album is for you if: You love Christmas music, but hate the religious references.

This album is not for you if: You have ever considered anything to be “blasphemous”…. ever.

Click here to get The Atheist Christmas Album – $10

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